White Swirl

I have a beard, you have a beard, do you have any upkeep secrets?

For the first seven months of this beard journey I operated under the Black Lips' mantra of "let it grow." I would only trim my mustache and occasionally the patchy parts high upon my cheeks. I took off a substantial portion in August (which has regrown) and now I feel like I'm in beard limbo. Part of me just wants to shave it all off while another part of me doesn't want to have to get back into the routine of shaving. I'm never satisfied with my razor and my face is probably fat now too. I would say too much time spent on beard upkeep is akin to manicuring your pubic hair, ie, unnecessary. Plus, there's this unintended kinship with other beardos that I'm not entirely comfortable with. If anything, I'm really itching to handlebar this mustache.